Why do some board members avoid tough questions?

Recently, I had a rare opportunity to engage with Church leaders from across the country at Uganda Martyrs University (UMU) during an on-campus leadership training. It was a room full of priests, nuns, and lay leaders, men and women deeply committed to mission, but also going through modern leadership challenges that Sunday sermons do not quite prepare one for.

After the presentation, I received an email from one of the participants who said, “Mr Strategy, why do some members avoid tough conversations?” A very good question. My respond from my experience with public and private boards is not related in any way the discussions and challenges shared by the participants during the training.`

In the boardroom, silence is often louder than dissent.

Some board members avoid tough questions not because they lack interest, but because they fear being exposed. I have seen this repeatedly. Directors sit through audit or risk committee meetings nodding silently, even when they do not understand a single slide in the cybersecurity report. Not because they are careless. Because they are unprepared. And that is the governance time bomb.

"Real leadership is forged in the fire of uncomfortable truths. Tough questions are not disloyal; they are the oxygen of healthy governance."

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There are five main reasons directors avoid hard conversations:

1. They lack subject matter confidence. Most directors were appointed for their networks or legacy. Few have kept up with modern risks like AI, climate, or digital fraud. They fear asking “stupid” questions that might expose them.
2. The culture discourages challenge. Some board cultures value harmony over truth. Directors avoid confrontation to maintain surface unity. But false peace is expensive.
3. Board packs are unreadable. Many briefings are designed to impress, not inform. Technical data is dumped without narrative. No wonder directors skip questions, they do not even know what to ask.
4. The Chair sets the wrong tone. If the Chair does not ask probing questions, others will not either. Leadership is caught, not taught.
5. Misguided respect for management. Some directors think asking tough questions is a sign of mistrust. No. That is oversight. Anything less is abdication.

So, what do I advise?

I recommend an “Inquiry Session” in every board meeting. Each director must submit at least one uncomfortable question in advance, yes, anonymously if needed. These questions are grouped by theme and discussed openly. No defensiveness allowed. Just governance at work.

The director engagement matrix

Real leadership is forged in the fire of uncomfortable truths. Tough questions are not disloyal; they are the oxygen of healthy governance. As I told the Church leaders at UMU, when the board goes silent, the institution begins to rot politely. You cannot let that to happen.